the sad side of adoption

Last night I opened E's book bag to check her papers. Thankfully she was in bed. I looked at one of the papers they had sent home and my heart sank. "The Way We Were..."

I held in my hand a paper asking for all kinds of information from when E. was a baby. Her height, what she liked as a baby, and a baby picture. My heart was first so sad for her. How awkward this day will be at school for her. Then my heart was sad for me. I don't have a picture of her before she was 6 years old. I don't know what my daughter looked like as a baby. I don't know if she hated peas or liked carrots. I don't know if she had a favorite doll or blanket that she carried around with her everywhere.

I am grateful I know now that she hates peas and likes carrots. I know that she likes dogs a lot and can't wait to have one of her own. I know she likes anything girly and won't even keep a water gun because it is a "boy toy."

I emailed E's teacher and let her know I didn't know a lot of the information they were asking for on the paper. I love her teacher and I know she will handle this delicately.

I am so glad I have the rest of my life to get to know my daughter better. I am so grateful no more pictures or holidays or birthdays will be missed.

I love my baby girl. She is my little sweet pea. Thankful for the years ahead...